The Raining Thorns Series - Epic Fantasy with a Comedic Twist

Howard Rosethorn is sent on a holy quest – he thinks. Or the Creys’ dragon will destroy the world and the end of days will come… or something. He’s not sure, since the holy flying cat flew into his face and kind of interrupted the rundown on the quest…

King Samuel Horne of Stoneguard is missing and Howie has been dispatched to find him – in the oft-avoided province of Adem, no less. He’s visiting the Creys: a deranged royal family consisting of an unattainable love interest, a dead-ish prince and a king that keeps severed heads as party decorations… sometimes with bite marks in. 

But that’s the least of his problems. A prophecy dictates that if King Sam dies, the end of the world is soon to follow – and with politics and casual evil at every turn, Howie’s on thin ice. Will the Creys help him? 

Or will King Sam die before it’s too late? 

The Antichrist has come in the form of a small dog, part-time. But that’s not important.

Princess Lilly-Anna Crey is engaged to be wed – to an older man. Which is slightly awkward given that her preference is for women her own age.

But rather than discuss the matter with her family in a reasonable manner, she’s going on an adventure instead, in disguise as a sailor with Stan and Ron – and finally get a dragon of her very own. Or maybe a pirate ship. She hasn’t quite decided yet.

However, terrible events are getting in the way of Lilly’s quest. Pirates of dubious background are close to finding out her true identity, Ron’s mother is trying to kill him, some bloke called Retribution Halle has gone missing at the end of a trail of dead bodies and the Sea Witch is circling the ship… not to mention the worrying realisation that her future stepson is, actually, extremely good-looking…

Oh, and every dragon Lilly touches seems to be dropping dead – putting a slight hitch on her pet-shopping ideas.

Will they survive this ill-considered adventure?

Or will they end up swimming with the fishes?

‘I have brought peace to the church… by joining the two faiths of Truphoria.’

Hope blinked incredulously.

‘But… but we hate each other,’ he said.

Truphoria’s two primary religious factions have put their differences aside to face the tyranny of their common enemy in unity. Well… mostly in unity.

Howie, his prophetic hero days now (with any luck) behind him, and Adrienne, now a freelance apothecary surgeon, return to Serpus to live near her beloved Uncle Archie. But things are a bit different than their last visit: Seth Crey is the King of Adem now, and bad blood from the events of their previous visit still remains.

Not only that, but there’s a mysterious young man on their heels calling himself the Prophet, and he has a concerning obsession with witch-burning… and he isn’t just limiting himself to Qattren and her poor dresses.

Not to mention the entity known simply as the Bastard, who’s holding a couple of grudges of his own…